The Middle East - God's Jock Itch

Sunday, April 30, 2006

Al Jazeera Action News

Blast from the Past - Khomeini on British Talk Show

Saturday, April 29, 2006

Ballot from Iran's Last Election

Nuclear Iran?

Friday, April 28, 2006

Gas Gauging

Memowars' Parking Lot

Because she deserved it

Extreme Islam Makeover - Home Edition

ITLC - Islamic Tender Love & Care

Sheikh Ahmad Shehab, Memowars' Ambassador of Love, speaks from experience with regard to marital issues.

Highlights include the many ingredients of ITLC:

Shehab - "ITLC, there are so many ingredients like ignoring to be angry, avoid to be angry, how? Keeping voodoo at all times. It will help you to be more balanced and not to get angry. And if you happen to get angry listen to Rasoul Allah, etc. etc., who says if you are angry sit down, and if you are sitting down lie down. Some of us say, 'If I lie down she will kick me in the stomach!' Noo, she will not kick you in the stomach... you will feel good inside."

Please forward comments to:

Ahmad Shehab
9 Charles Street W.
Toronto, ON M4Y 1RA

Or email:

Tuesday, April 25, 2006


At Memowars, we cover all kinds of unique sports. From decapitated head soccer, to camel racing...we bring it to you.

CIA Captures Rogue al Qaeda Agent

Al Bacca

Origin: Tatooine, East Africa

Not a hair over 55

Led the attack on the USS Cole and the famous 2003 escape from Abu Gharib prison, where was instrumental teaming up with little furry Iraqis to bludgeon US military personnel with blunt objects.

New Revenue for Al Qaeda

Desperate for cash, Al Qaeda commander Osama Bin Laden recently appeared on the Latin American version of "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" (Quien quisiera ser Millonario), where he promptly lost when he incorrectly answered the first question.

Monday, April 24, 2006

My Life. My Card

Sunday, April 23, 2006

Muslim Rave

Man Antaram - (Translation: I'm a Baboon)

Click here for more Ahmadijad

Friday, April 21, 2006

Terrorists Identified...

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

A call for martyrdom-seeking individuals...

Tehran, Iran – A top general of Iran’s elite Islamic Revolutionary Guards Corps issued on Tuesday a direct threat to the United States and its allies, warning that the Islamic Republic had identified “all the weak points of our enemies” and has suicide operation volunteers “ready to strike at these sensitive locations” in retaliation to any attack.

“We know all of the enemies’ weak points and what to do against them. Today, we have ready martyrdom-seeking individuals who are ready to strike at these sensitive points”, Brigadier General Mohammad Kossari, who heads the Security Bureau of Iran’s Armed Forces, told the state-owned news agency ILNA.

Are you seeking martyrdom?

Mail applications to:

For Allah - Blessed be he
P.O. Box 1234
Tehran, Iran 01526


In the Name of God

Preliminary Registration for Martyrdom Operations

I ----------------, child of ----------------, born 13----- (Islamic calendar), the City of: ---------------- proclaim my preparedness for carrying out martyrdom operations:

---- against the occupiers of the holy sites (referring to Najaf, Karbala, and other places in Iraq.)

---- against the occupiers of (Jerusalem)

---- for carrying out the death sentence of the infidel Salman Rushdie

Also, I would like to become an active member of the Army of Martyrs of the International Islamic Movement. Yes ---- No ----

Contact telephone:
Applicant's address:
Applicant's signature:

Monday, April 17, 2006

Everyone's Doing the Allah

Why is it that when athletes and musicians spiral out of control, the first thing they reach for is Allah? Not the Jewish or Christian God, but Mr. Muslim himself??? At Memowars, we don't have an answer for that, but we do have a great clip of Mike Tyson at the lowest of his lows:

MMMM...smells like denial

Some thoughts on illegal immigration

Hello, Memowars readers. It's not often that the editors of this blog write an op-ed piece, but I had a thought I wanted to share with our 2,000+ fan base and could not resist this opportunity.

Unless you have been hiding in a hole somewhere, you have almost certainly heard about the illegal immigration issue lately. On the left, many have called for the granting of immigrant rights and even the naturalization of all illegals in the United States. On the right, politicians have pushed for Mexicans and other illegals to be stripped of their rights and even deported. At Memowars, we feel both sides have it wrong.

Illegals are not the real problem in this country: Witches are. Did you know that Witches have been the cause of all major disease, economic downturns, natural disasters, pyramid schemes, and car accidents since 1504, when they first landed on our shores? They have defiled our flag with their green faces and broomsticks, and yet we allow them to stay here, casting spells and spreading their dermatological problems everywhere. There has never existed in this country a time where we persecute Witches for being different.

With your support, we would like to free America. Leave a comment and let us know what you think!

Friday, April 07, 2006

Zacarias Moussaoui Accepts Death Penalty Nomination